Episode 5: Status

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This week we unearth the grotesque. The most sickening symptoms of celebrity culture come crawling out of the wounds of a lonely child so desperate to be liked. This episode might make you feel queasy, but therapy proves that things are better out than in. If you’ve ever dreamt of fame and fortune, it’s time to look at yourself from the other side of the mirror, and update your status. 

Apologies for the subtle interference during this recording, but DAN KEPT HIS PHONE ON AND PROMISES HE WON’T DO IT AGAIN. 

Episode 4: Autism

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Something is up this week. Maybe it’s the humidity, maybe it’s the problematic consequence of James removing his trousers upon arrival at the Private Practice. We never set out to drop the A bomb so soon, this was meant to be an episode about vanity. But James’ internal conflict was such that an autistic clusterfudge erupted in the room and sat in the thick air, clouding any insight and commanding the agenda. What follows is a thorough assessment of James’ position on the autistic spectrum. We went through all 50 questions in the autism test, but for your sanity many of these have been edited out. However, James’ score is very much out of 50, so don’t go on a rampage if you’re keeping a tally while/whilst you listen and it doesn’t add up to the same figure you hear in the programme.  

Episode 3: Confidence

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If you were thinking James seems sweet and innocent (“aah, he thinks he’s a megalomaniac but really he was just kind and lonely as a child”), it’s time you saw through to his darker side. Making cancer jokes, staring at men in the changing room… In this episode Dan asks some excellent questions about the feelings behind anxiety and confidence, which James spectacularly fails to answer. But don’t worry, we’ll come back to this subject by about episode 234, whereby you’ll definitely have all the answers you need. Please be prepared for lots of fun distorting strong language in ways which totally don’t conceal the words at all.

Episode 2: Megalomania

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Having decided to “give Dan a go”, James arrives to his first proper session on the lips sofa with a burning question; was he a megalomaniac child? When it turns out this was meant to be a rhetorical question, the extent to which James will require many further sessions becomes all too clear.

Warning: Contains material about complex subjects which some listeners may find problematically simplistic.